i love your poem it’s sincere and beautiful, i can feel the feelings you pour as I read it . I used to write and read a poem (I’m busy with my classes that I don’t have much time for it) for me poetry and poems is a beautiful ways to express you feelings and emotions and also a beautiful ways to feel and understand others feelings ,through poems i can feel something that I used to not know before . thank you for sharing your work and stories , it reminds me of the old days. Some people might think poetry was nothing and just short lines of words but this nothings actually makes my heart beat a sound I’ve never heard before . Keep on writing and if it’s possible I would be happy if you willing to share some with me
Aww, thank you so much for your kind words I find myself often thinking poetically, so writing poetry has always felt very natural. I'm so glad that other people can enjoy and resonate with my poems I have lots of mismatched lines and verses that I hope to expand into completed poems soon, and I'll be sure to share them if I do (^^)
I'm a fan of poetry! The poems here are great. I do write my own poems periodically, but its super dependant on my mood. Mine are always super sad and abstract which makes me very hesitant to share them usually. Here's one of my newer ones. I apologize if its too dramatic
San Bluciel
When the clock ticks It speaks of dreams of meaning beyond Purple sparkles algebraic shadows
Each second lies upon unmarked time Gloating on self on control on nine The hole grows ever spiraling inside
A rotten carrot hung above the starving Interactions of inane conscious conniving Waves of deep blue signs wasted shining
Kept quiet are the crimes unseen Damned to be the intemperie Maddening for the unbelieved Help for the Silent Aquamarine
Content to be alive are the night skies Heavy be the four fold fractals collide Solitude are the clouds of worlds that abide Mind melding drawls of the inward mind
To look aside is to die
Bluciel A Fool (Extra piece I wrote a day later)
Along the unawoken Scrawling in the flowers Avoidant of the bright sky Consternation of dreams unkind Dreadful of the officious inside
It all lies in a bubble Flickering in jamais vu Watching on the other side
daAAmN boi you got the right stuff! The words you used in the whole poem got me bewildered Poems are always dramatic 😤😤 It's a little hard for me to understand but how in the world did you use those words "purple sparkles algebraic shadows"!? wow you should be a poet too!
It's very freeform and abstract, but packs a lot of meaning. Had to look up few words (e.g. "intemperie"). At first I though the title was French, but that's not the case. I assume it still means "Saint Blue Sky"? Likely "Bluciel" being a name as opposed to the literal "blue sky"?
Here's my rudimentary understanding: Searching for meaning within the abstract/uncertain flow of time (stanza 1-2) → A sense of growing desperation (stanza 2) → Human Illusion/delusion (stanza 3) → Hidden suffering or Moral neglect? (stanza 4) → The last stanza gives me vibes of "solitude" and "introspective", but I can't explain it well. → Final line feels like a warning of the consequences of ignorance. More of like a spiritual "death".
Hopefully that's at least somewhat close to what you had in mind.
"A rotten carrot hung above the starving" is such a nice line. A "carrot on a stick", but the "reward" is rotten, and "hung above" adds a sense of control and/or manipulation.
There's also this really nice cool, melancholic colour palette in the background. "Blu", "blue", "purple", "deep blue" and "Aquamarine".
I know I am late but that anime is a peak!!! The way that boy confess "yamazakura kimi no egao suki " (If i was not wrong) made me smiling ばかみたいよ(ꈍᴗꈍ)tbh that was one of my first romance movies
Full honesty I've only watched the English ver. Because I liked that movie before I started learning Japanese and then my family got rid of Netflix so I can't watch it now. :kao_wail: but I did get the super rare manga so it works out yk?
I think that has some real potential. Depending on which way you decide to go with it, that first line, strong as it is, may cause trouble later. You may be able to avoid that by changing the second “heart” to “please.” But maybe you want that kind of trouble.
I love poetry so much I mean it is just another wonderful way to express emotions and turn it into a form of art. Art is very lovely!! To me poems feel sort like a puzzle and make me feel super accomplished when I figure out how to end it!!
Here's a poem I attempted to make but ultimately got stuck, I was trying to do an "abab" pattern ( i'm a amateur writer when it comes to poems...)
Winter comes, winter goes
The snow falls above all,
white specks flow by
and fall to my side.
Edit: I figured it out!! :D ( well... at least a little bit)
I think that has some real potential. Depending on which way you decide to go with it, that first line, strong as it is, may cause trouble later. You may be able to avoid that by changing the second “heart” to “please.” But maybe you want that kind of trouble.
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Thank you! I'm not accustomed to writing abstract poems like this, but I'm trying to expand my horizons :) I myself am not quite sure where it will go, so I guess we'll have to see!
When it comes to writing poetry, I believe what makes it good is not the perceived quality or surface meaning. I believe that a poem is written with the mind, not the goal in mind. If it has too much intent, it loses what it truly is for. Poems don't necessarily have rules, moreof the way painting would. It's the words of art, in a manner of speaking. TLDR don't try too hard to make a poem good, as it ironically may ruin it instead. You are free to still set rules, but keep it loose so you can pack meaning in there.
My poetry often ends up not-happy cause I usually write poetry as a way to air grievances, but at the same time, I guess it also helps you learn to express oneself in a way you normally wouldn't in most cases.
To judge a book by its cover Is rejection of life itself
Words aren't meant to be read But rather taken to the soul
-
Lily pad on the water Hole in broken cords alight Violet lights emanating
Reaching into the static Crawling amidst them A melted concept
Ringing of none Surface a fair shimmer A sad butterfly
Yellow streaks Only for a moment Little purple dots
-
Even though I want to sleep I must never close my eyes Not if I'm close to the edge
Spare moments are never kind Passing with one after another Each separate second fading Whatever is left will be soon
Yet I must never close my eyes To set aside my sorrows Is simply death itself
I'm afraid of I'm afraid of afraid of What's going to happen to me Even though I want to sleep
, i can feel the feelings you pour as I read it . I used to write and read a poem (I’m busy with my classes that I don’t have much time for it) for me poetry and poems is a beautiful ways to express you feelings and emotions and also a beautiful ways to feel and understand others feelings ,through poems i can feel something that I used to not know before .
thank you for sharing your work and stories , it reminds me of the old days. Some people might think poetry was nothing and just short lines of words but this nothings actually makes my heart beat a sound I’ve never heard before . Keep on writing and if it’s possible I would be happy if you willing to share some with me
I find myself often thinking poetically, so writing poetry has always felt very natural. I'm so glad that other people can enjoy and resonate with my poems 
