i love your poem it’s sincere and beautiful, i can feel the feelings you pour as I read it . I used to write and read a poem (I’m busy with my classes that I don’t have much time for it) for me poetry and poems is a beautiful ways to express you feelings and emotions and also a beautiful ways to feel and understand others feelings ,through poems i can feel something that I used to not know before . thank you for sharing your work and stories , it reminds me of the old days. Some people might think poetry was nothing and just short lines of words but this nothings actually makes my heart beat a sound I’ve never heard before . Keep on writing and if it’s possible I would be happy if you willing to share some with me
Aww, thank you so much for your kind words I find myself often thinking poetically, so writing poetry has always felt very natural. I'm so glad that other people can enjoy and resonate with my poems I have lots of mismatched lines and verses that I hope to expand into completed poems soon, and I'll be sure to share them if I do (^^)
I'm a fan of poetry! The poems here are great. I do write my own poems periodically, but its super dependant on my mood. Mine are always super sad and abstract which makes me very hesitant to share them usually. Here's one of my newer ones. I apologize if its too dramatic
San Bluciel
When the clock ticks It speaks of dreams of meaning beyond Purple sparkles algebraic shadows
Each second lies upon unmarked time Gloating on self on control on nine The hole grows ever spiraling inside
A rotten carrot hung above the starving Interactions of inane conscious conniving Waves of deep blue signs wasted shining
Kept quiet are the crimes unseen Damned to be the intemperie Maddening for the unbelieved Help for the Silent Aquamarine
Content to be alive are the night skies Heavy be the four fold fractals collide Solitude are the clouds of worlds that abide Mind melding drawls of the inward mind
To look aside is to die
Bluciel A Fool (Extra piece I wrote a day later)
Along the unawoken Scrawling in the flowers Avoidant of the bright sky Consternation of dreams unkind Dreadful of the officious inside
It all lies in a bubble Flickering in jamais vu Watching on the other side
daAAmN boi you got the right stuff! The words you used in the whole poem got me bewildered Poems are always dramatic 😤😤 It's a little hard for me to understand but how in the world did you use those words "purple sparkles algebraic shadows"!? wow you should be a poet too!
It's very freeform and abstract, but packs a lot of meaning. Had to look up few words (e.g. "intemperie"). At first I though the title was French, but that's not the case. I assume it still means "Saint Blue Sky"? Likely "Bluciel" being a name as opposed to the literal "blue sky"?
Here's my rudimentary understanding: Searching for meaning within the abstract/uncertain flow of time (stanza 1-2) → A sense of growing desperation (stanza 2) → Human Illusion/delusion (stanza 3) → Hidden suffering or Moral neglect? (stanza 4) → The last stanza gives me vibes of "solitude" and "introspective", but I can't explain it well. → Final line feels like a warning of the consequences of ignorance. More of like a spiritual "death".
Hopefully that's at least somewhat close to what you had in mind.
"A rotten carrot hung above the starving" is such a nice line. A "carrot on a stick", but the "reward" is rotten, and "hung above" adds a sense of control and/or manipulation.
There's also this really nice cool, melancholic colour palette in the background. "Blu", "blue", "purple", "deep blue" and "Aquamarine".